Chuck vs Sarah's Bomb Shell
by AKAdenny
Summary: Chuck has watched Bryce die but the most emotional and traumatic event comes from flashing on Sarah's personal life.


A/N: Hope you like this. Sort of an overdone scene that I imagine we could see in March.

Chuck vs Sarah's Bomb Shell

Sarah Walker did not bother to knock as she burst through the door just like she had in so many past missions. But this time, instead of kicking the door in with her foot, she turned the handle and just walked in.

She didn't have her guns out ready to blast away at the first sign of movement. She didn't have a knife in each hand ready to end the life of some miserable low-life.

But she did have serious intent.

Morgan practically jump out of his chair to the surprise of the tall blonde woman barging in saying "Chuck, we need to talk." One look at the steel, cobalt-blue eyes of the woman told him that he would rather be at the Buy More listening to the pathetic ranting of his new-old boss, than to cross an angry Sarah Walker.

"I'll see you later, buddy," he said as he got up from the chair in front of the TV where he and Chuck had just been playing video games. "Don't kill him, he's not paid his half of the rent this month," Morgan said in a low voice as he passed her.

Sarah waited until the door was closed before she really looked at Chuck. And even though she had heard that he had let himself slip since their emotional and traumatic night almost two months ago, she was still shocked by what she saw.

Chuck sat in his boxers, a grey T shirt and a blue robe. His hair was long and unkept. But what shocked her most was the full beard he sported. As shocked as she was, she was even more hurt, and the pain of that hurt could be discerned by the one guy who knew the nuances of her expressions most.

"Just how long were you going to make me wait?" she asked, her eyes a mixture of anger and sorrow. "You haven't returned my calls."

Chuck looked at her as though he hadn't understood what she had said but then finally responded to her. "I'm still trying to wrap my head around everything. This isn't about punishment, it's about understanding."

"From where I sit, back in my hotel, alone and sorry and frustrated…it feels a lot like punishment."

"Sarah, please, I just need time."

"I get that, I really do. But couldn't you include me in on some of it. Do you have to work it out alone?"

"I'm doing the best I can."

Sarah's expression fell. She clearly expected some kind of concession from him. "So after I bare my soul and tell you how I feel and what I want for our future, you're still going to make me wait until you come to gripes with what you saw?" she said and waited for him to speak. But he said nothing and she grew more angry than hurt.

"Chuck, I've tried to be patient with you. Lord knows I understand what that must have been like for you. But don't wait so long that when you finally come to me…I'm not around," she said and turned for the door.

"Wait!"

She stopped in her tracks. She didn't really want to leave him like this. Turning slowly she saw that he had stood. She took a tentative step back to the middle of the room, towards him. "Chuck, just tell me how I can help. Is it trust or something else? Just talk to me." As she spoke, she had taken another couple of steps towards him so that now they were only a couple of steps apart.

Chuck ran hands of exasperation through his hair. "Yeah, its trust. Sarah, I thought we had a commitment toward each other."

"Commitment, and when did we share our commitment. I had told Bryce before that mission that we were going to be professional only. As stupid as it was for me, your handler, I had made a commitment. But then you tell me that we can never have a normal life together and that we need to forget about trying to make a life for ourselves. And although you didn't know it, Bryce and I had regular briefings," Sarah said, not apologetic. "And in case you didn't know it, this life gets lonely."

"I was thinking of you. I didn't want you to get hurt or worse, because you cared about me."

"I know, but it was that very night that Bryce called. That's what you flashed on a couple of months ago. I knew it was a mistake and that we were over. But I needed someone because I didn't have…wasn't going to have you."

"I just didn't expect to see you and Bryce in the castle making love. I knew that you had kept that from me. It hurt."

"Chuck, I would do almost anything to relive that night. It was such a mistake and it hurt the only two men that I've ever cared about."

"I just never thought that you would betray me," Chuck said, his eyes red and misty.

"I've never betrayed you."

Chuck's head jerked up and his sad face turned angry. "Sarah, you admitted to betraying me back at your hotel two months ago. Are you denying it now?"

"I never said any such thing. When you asked if there was betrayal between us, I said yes. That's when you stormed out of my apartment before I could explain it to you."

Chucks faced scrunched up in perplexity. "I don't understand. You said there was betrayal between us. Now you say you never betrayed me. Which one is it, Sarah?" Chuck knew her well enough to see that answering his question was difficult for her.

Sarah looked him in the eye preparing to tell him what she had done but then lost her nerve and looked at her shoes. She then took a deep breath and returned his gaze.

"Chuck, I never betrayed you. Not after we had made a commitment. And for me that was when we went on the run. No, the person I betrayed was Bryce."

"What! Sarah, your not making any sense. You don't betray someone by sleeping with them."

Sarah took a step toward Chuck, her eyes imploring him to understand without the need for her to explain it…with words. "I meant to tell you this when the time was right. But that time never came. And then you flashed on us." Sarah turned her back to him. "I've screwed this up more than you can imagine."

He saw just how vulnerable she was and despite the hurt he held in his heart, his natural instincts kicked in and he went to comfort her.

"What are you talking about, Sarah," he said gently grabbing her arm just above the elbow.

She turned suddenly and put her hands on his waist. She tried in vain to hold the tears from running down her face. "Chuck, I did betray someone that I cared about. But that wasn't you…it was Bryce, my fiancé."

Chuck backed away from her grasp. "Bryce was you fiancé?"

"When I first came to LA, yes."

Chuck's head started to swim. It felt like everything he had ever known was a lie. He couldn't put together a coherent thought. "So, when did you break up?" he finally muttered. Almost afraid to hear the answer.

Sarah took another step towards him so she could touch him. "At Ellie's wedding, sort of," she said meekly.

"Sort of, what does that mean?"

"Look, Bryce knew that I had developed feeling for you. But I don't think he ever thought that I would stay with you once the mission was over. When you were free of the intersect and he and I were assigned to work together, I'm pretty sure he thought I would leave. But when he asked me, I told him I was staying with you. That's when I officially broke off the engagement."

"Sarah, I'm-"

"So you see, when I say that there was betrayal between us, I mean to say that I betrayed Bryce when I fell for you."

Chuck saw the pain that Sarah felt for having jilted Bryce for him. He thought back to her reaction as the Ring members carried Bryce's body away. He remembered thinking that she was very emotional. Now, he knew why. Bryce had died and the last thing Sarah had done to him was break his heart.

He suddenly felt like a total and complete jerk. Closing the distance on her, he wrapped her in his arms. "I'm sorry I didn't give you the chance to explain. I've acted like a moron," he said and felt her body shake as she cried into his chest. She stayed like this for a long while but Chuck didn't mind. He wanted to be there for her and he knew that right now, Sarah needed him more than she ever had.

Finally, he felt her pull away and he released his grasp on her.

"Chuck, I feel bad that I kept my relationship with Bryce from you as long as I did. But that was my personal life and I wasn't supposed to tell you anything about my personal life."

Chuck reached down and brushed his lips across hers. They had become close enough were that small act of affection did not seem weird. Sarah appreciated it and showed him so with a smile.

"Hey, let's just get back to normal. It won't be so bad. We'll go on missions like before and who knows, if Dad ever shows up, maybe he can get this new intersect out of my head and we can live that life I know we both want to live."

"Speaking of the intersect, have you had any more flashes?"

Now it was Chuck's turn to become sheepish. "Yeah, I've had one." He did not meet her gaze.

Sarah frowned at his reaction. She knew him too well. "What did you flash on?"

Chuck managed to raise his eyes to hers. "Sarah, don't freak out. But I flashed on your non-redacted professional and personal file."

Sarah blinked three times and it looked like it took that long for her to understand what he had said to her. Finally, with a low voice that approached a whisper and tinged with apprehension, "Have you opened it?"

"No, it's just lying in the wasteland of my mind. You don't know how many times I've wanted to, but I knew that you wouldn't want that."

Sarah smiled warmly at that. "Promise me that you will not open that file unless I'm with you. There are some missions that I want to be able to discuss with you. Not that I'm ashamed of anything I've done. But I want to make sure you don't misinterpret anything you might see."

"I promise, but now that I have access to your file, someone from your past could trigger a flash or even a pair of earrings your wore on a mission. It could happen with anything."

Sarah moved closer to him and put her arms around his waist. She smiled as she looked up into his eyes. "I could have never imagined when I first saw you in the Buy More that day over three years ago, that I would be standing here with you talking about my past. I doubt if you can appreciate just what all of that means."

Chuck smiled and pulled her closer. This time he used his lips with full intent and Sarah responded in kind.

When they pulled away breathless, Chuck looked at her and smiled. "Care if I come over to your place tonight? Morgan is getting a little stale."

"Sure," she said smiling as well.

"Good, cause I'm in the mood for some lite reading. I was thinking that, "Sarah Walker, the Early Years," would be interesting."

Sarah's expression was one he had never seen before. It was serious and playful all at the same time. But also in the mix was an appraisal of sorts. For Chuck, he interpreted it as though she was saying, _Okay, Chuck Bartowski, let's see what you're made of. _

Sarah turned to leave and Chuck walked her to the door. "Is 7:00p.m. Okay?" Chuck asked.

"Sure, but if you want to come over earlier and get started on that reading, be my guest," she said as she opened the door.

He waited until she was almost to her car before he responded. "Hey Sarah, I'm going to shave and take a shower and I'm be right over, Okay?"

He watched her smile and knew through all the hard times they would have to deal with in their future, they had what it took to make it. He closed the door and hurried to the bathroom anxious to see her again.

He was already missing her.

The End


End file.
